Skip to main content

Reply to this post | Go Back
View Post [edit]

Poster: Dancinbears Date: Aug 25, 2007 3:25pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: from dancinbears

Hi boys

so I feel very much in the middle the last few days. Dire and I actually made a joke about this to each other-- if something goes wrong it will put me in the center of it all. and when SDH first came over to deahook he posted "if something goes wrong it's dancinbears fault!"

Everybody knows my story about how and why I found my way to LMA. Deadhook is a big part of my life. I love it, and the people there, very much.

There is much more that goes on there besides "The Dead Zone", which I'm sure EVERYONE has been reading lately since this whole "LMA vs Deadhook" thing started. There are TONS of different little sub-group forums, there is TREES & VINES forum-- extremely popular and active!...there is DH LIVE to stream and download shows. At the bottom it's a resource for links to a whole bunch of other sites. and there are "Searching For The Sound" and BNP forums to help you find shows that way too. It's a HUGE trading community! Besides for that there are TONS of FAQ pages to TEACH new people about all kinds of things...for example like Bit Torrent.

anyway the point that I am making is that Deadhook is about more than just the people that are there. Though for mushy-gooey dancinbears, the people are what keep me coming back again and again.

On the other side of the coin are all of you. I was so angry in the beginning when it was such a big deal that I wanted to tell other deadheads about another site and you guys freaked out. and that it was such a big deal that I was a woman! I stayed just to piss some of you off really. but I honestly turned right around and began to care about so many of you. Does everybody remember the first few times we GROKKED? Do you guys know how long it's been since then? that was back in January. I love to GROK with you guys. I love that I know everybody's first name, and how old most of you are, and the little details that you have shared about your families and lives. oh, and your pictures too! :) Makes me remember that you are indeed a wonderful kind group of men, who happen to act like a bunch of teen-age boys from time to time. I've gotten so used to all of you, and have so many of you "figured out". :) and I promise I mean that in only a good way. Because even thou you will flame one another, deep down most of you are MUSH! simply kind, caring men-- who I believe in real life, are gentleman.

I wanted to share another site with you. that was all. you didn't have to come over to it if you didn't want to. It's not for everyone. There are some of us from LMA who use Deadhook only for trees and vines forum and nothing else. that's cool. everyone should get whatever they need out of it.

In turn I shared something that you gave me-- GROK-- with Deadhook. Over the last few weeks some of you have joined in on Deadhook GROK. Same way we get JOY out of Grokking, I wanted to share that with others. I'm a MUSH too you know- I like to share. :)

It doesn't have to be a US vs. THEM situation. I am asking that it not be, because I am at both places. I care about both places very much.

I know that some of you are upset that the moderators there did not handle the situation immediately. People are human with lives, and jobs, and commitments. and this is just a forum, and so is deadhook. no one has time to sit and watch what gets posted 24/7. But I can tell you what is true. The people who moderate deadhook would get around to responding to you, and dealing with anything that needs to, as soon as they could. Please read again (if you are interested), and notice that responses were posted. They may not be to your liking, or how you wish it was handled, but it was not ignored.

the nice thing about deadhook, is that a situation like "2", or outright mean-spirited bashing, will not occur. Yes, everyone is human-- someone might post those things and cause drama occassionally-- but it will be removed and the situation taken care of in it's own time and manner.

I am asking you guys-- please-- to just stop the joking around of using the LMA vs. Deadhook thing in thread titles. I understand you want to discuss what has happened there, and how you feel about it with each other--and you have every right to. Please just remember that sometimes the things that you say, when mean-spirited, could hurt someone's feelings.

I honestly believe that some of you genuinely like deadhook enough, and have maybe gotten something out of it, that in spite of this past few days, you'll stick around there. and that makes me happy. that means I get to see twice as much of you. means you will make me laugh twice as much too, because I find so many of you to have the funniest sense of humor! :)

and those of you that don't come over-- that's fine too. I will still be here behind the scenes, reading all the things you write, and Grokking. I will get to still send out those smile faces :) and {{hugs}}!

my love~
~dancin'


This post was modified by Dancinbears on 2007-08-25 16:14:28

This post was modified by Dancinbears on 2007-08-25 22:25:30

Reply to this post
Reply [edit]

Poster: AshesRising Date: Aug 25, 2007 3:01pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone- READ THIS-- Please

Dancinbears: have you ever noticed how many times you write posts with phrases and/or words such as "being in the middle," "drama," "woman," etc.? If it is of any value to you and helps you re-focus, let me assure you that I do not consider you in the center of anything.

Also, if it is of any additional value to help with your re-focus: I communicate with a lot of people who don't write posts but like to read the Forum --- in fact, I deal with over 3-dozen people on a weekly basis that I met here who have never written a single post. Not one of my non-posting friends has ever mentioned your name --- ever; that's a minimum of 40 people over the past year (realistically, probably 50 people). I hope it provides some balance, comfort, insight, or "whatever" for you to realize that you really are not at the center of anything. You mention it so often I cannot help but think that you are either obsessed or stressed-out about being "in the middle" or "at the center." It must be extremely stressful on some level(s) whether you are aware of it or not; it's best to bring it into the Light so you can let it go.

The music is in the center of the sphere -- nobody is in the middle of anything here unless she/he/it puts herself/himself/itslef into the middle. I am unaware of any sexist bullshit here as well. A year ago I had no clue that you were a woman ..until, naturally, you inserted it into one of your posts...I really couldn't give a shit if people here are men, women or cloned two-headed sheep. Why do you think the Grateful Dead chose a skeleton as one of their original archetypes? (Which, unfortunately, got hijacked over the years and somehow got debased into being a dancing bear. I must admit I never could have imagined that transformation; I guess it's just another example of how the sacred can become profane. Made by the hands of man....)

I also hope this feedback provides you the freedom to cease writing topics such as "Everyone- READ THIS-- Please" === there's a lot of very high-quality, decent individuals here -- and I don't use those terms lightly --- very high-quality, decent individuals --- so you need to realize that when they see a topic such as "Everyone - READ THIS -- Please," they are gonna read it ....many will read such a topic with compassion in their heart thinking that something is wrong and possibly they can assist. .....only to find out that they are being drawn into an illusion of one who perceives one's self as being "in the middle."

I, for one, am very, very happy that you have Deadhook to add value to your life. I cannot speak for my friends that are present but remain silent --- as I said, none of them have ever mentioned you --- ever --- in any of the hundreds of emails and letters/discs I have exchanged with them. I hope these facts help you re-focus and find the true "middle." Your mind may become less obsessed and/or stressed. After all, the compass always points to Terrapin, doesn't it?

Your Forum friend, --- AshesRising

The Next Step
Lyrics: Robert Hunter

All we need are flesh and bones
Stars to steer and the faith of stones
It all works out if you leave it alone
We'll take the next step on our own

All we need are hearts of thunder
Set in the compass of the deep dark sky
All we need is all we've got
Could be a little - could be a lot

Depend on the wind
Of distant drums
We'll know the next step
When it comes

All we need is the key to the city
Open the gate, yeah isn't it pretty
All we need is the weight of a feather
To tip the balance in favor of love

Cold iron shimmy to address the lock
A little more mercy and a little less talk
Crawl on your belly through a river of tears
All we need is another ten years

Depend on the wind
Of distant drums
We'll know the next step
When it comes

Borne on the tide all flecked with foam
All we need is a long way home
Federation sunset don't pay rent
Bury the baby and strike the tent

Words may differ but the song remains
Safe in the whistle of passing trains
Ninety-nine miles of solid gold track
Lay on the whistle and don't look back

Depend on the wind
Of distant drums
We'll know the next step
When it comes

Depend on the wind
Of distant drums
We'll know the next step
When it comes
[@Robert Hunter, 1996>eternity]

This post was modified by AshesRising on 2007-08-25 22:01:03

Reply to this post
Reply [edit]

Poster: Dancinbears Date: Aug 25, 2007 3:22pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: from dancinbears

Ashes thank you for this response. I actually smiled to myself when I read it, and I immediately thought of CLIFF. know why? Cliff is famous for trying to make a point and then linking past threads to supposrt his point. and I thought that I could do that now, thou I won't. there were many months that you were not here at forum, and most definately a lot of "drama" occured while you were gone. There are thread titles that begin "the whole damn dancinbears thing"...and "dancinbears 2-faced forum" just to give you examples.

I stated in my thread that I FELT in the middle. and that had nothing to do with you, or any of the 50 other people you mentioned in your posts. But it is a valid feeling that I have, and it was meant to share it with the friends that I have at both forums. and my post was directed to them. I will change the title so that it is better directed at who I was trying to speak to.

I do find it amusing that while you are not involved whatsoever, and have not mentioned my name to any others in e-mails and the like, that you chose to make a "Joke" about the situation by starting 2 threads with the title "LMA vs. Deadhook" with no reguard whatsoever to those that may care about those places, or how such joking would make anyone feel.



This post was modified by Dancinbears on 2007-08-25 22:22:38

Reply to this post
Reply [edit]

Poster: mickmac Date: Aug 25, 2007 4:27pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: from dancinbears

Go where you want...do what you want. Who cares? I have no interest in joining any other "chat" room. Who cares? 10/26/1971 should be what we care about!! I care!

This post was modified by mickmac on 2007-08-25 23:27:55

Reply to this post
Reply [edit]

Poster: elbow1126 Date: Aug 25, 2007 10:18am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone- READ THIS-- Please

Dear Dancin'

When I first started seeing the posts here about some issues at deadhook, you were the first person I thought of. No way was this what you had in mind. Sorry it hasn't worked out quite as you planned. I myself have not ventured over there since I barely venture over here and that seems to be enough for me for now. That's why I hope that your comment about being behind the scenes and reading posts does not mean that you no longer plan to participate here. You do add something here and it would be a shame to lose just because you feel like your in the middle of something. My two cents.

Best wishes,

Larry

Reply to this post
Reply [edit]

Poster: Stephanie Brown Date: Aug 25, 2007 12:28pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone- READ THIS-- Please

Dear Gina,

Please don't feel bad. You cannot be responsible for other people's actions or words.

I can only speak as I find: I love Deadhook and the welcome I received there. I love the people here who believed in me and supported me.

There will be always be nice people and nasty people anywhere in this world. This is true of the internet as much as anywhere else.
You definitely belong in the nice category.

I for one will only post (at Deadhook and here) about music as it is one of my greatest passions in this life.

Massive hugs
Stephanie

Reply to this post
Reply [edit]

Poster: sel2ims Date: Aug 26, 2007 12:07pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: from dancinbears

First let me say, dancing bare started the shit in the first place with her backroom bullshit.

She must like DH because of the control factor. I know the controlfactor has ruin'd plenty of shows. She would just love a show in Irvine.

This 2 thing is only because of the balances.

So if Gina feels safe overthere it's a goodthing, but don't think for One minute it has to be her way or you need to responded in a gd-correct fashion.

Nothing like a creature telling another creature they're to creeping at a creep show.

Now can all you Hookers out there tell me how much ?

Reply to this post
Reply [edit]

Poster: stratocaster Date: Aug 25, 2007 11:56am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone- READ THIS-- Please

i don't get how or why people get so worked up about the internet or to allow some text to offend them...seems that these kind of social hypochondriacs keep the pharmaceutical companies in business...

Reply to this post
Reply [edit]

Poster: direwolf0701 Date: Aug 25, 2007 10:37am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone- READ THIS-- Please

"Because even thou you will flame one another, deep down most of you are MUSH! simply kind, caring men-- who I believe in real life, are gentleman."



i extremely offended by that comment!!! ;)

(i need an emoticon or four)

Reply to this post
Reply [edit]

Poster: BryanE Date: Aug 25, 2007 11:08am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone- READ THIS-- Please

(i need an emoticon or four)

That's at least one advantage the other site has.

Reply to this post
Reply [edit]

Poster: AshesRising Date: Aug 25, 2007 1:33pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone- READ THIS-- Please

...why do I feel like listening to some Kurt Cobain? ...especially in light of the fact that I have listened to only one of his tunes ...once ...on "MTV Unplugged"

Reply to this post
Reply [edit]

Poster: stilldead77 Date: Aug 25, 2007 6:26pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone- READ THIS-- Please

...spirit, crank it up man

Reply to this post
Reply [edit]

Poster: WHARFRAT Date: Aug 25, 2007 12:00pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone- READ THIS-- Please

Gina,

Clowns to left of me Jokers to the right
here i am stuck in the middle with you.
Don't feel bad just because you felt like sharing
stuff that you are passionate about with people that
you care about. You did your part and now it's up to everybody else to figure it out.

If you introduce a man and a women and they get married and
a couple a years later they get divorced thats not your fault.
Ok in this case it only took a couple a days lol.
I'm sure the people over at the hook are a fine bunch
of folks. If they don't like the people you brought in
they have the same option of not reading thier posts
as you do here. At the same time it doesn't mean it's
ok to flame people you really don't know just because
you disagree with that persons post.

Don't blame yourself or let others place the blame on
you. You are a very caring and wonderful personality
and are very kind to share your time both here and at
the hook. I'm sure once everyone from both forums
figure it out it will all be good.
In the mean time I'm just gonna hang out here.
I love this place and chatzy is home to me.
Besides i don't have enough time for two forums.
One is enough for me. You hang in there girl.

)))))))BIG HUGG(((((((

Peace, Steve